Ch. 19: Hakuna MatataJanuary 1, 2011 at 6:13 pm | Posted in Generation 5 | 6 Comments
Previous: Cinderelly, Cinderelly
I can’t believe
it’s not butter it’s 2011!
To celebrate I’m going to make a SUPER CHAPTER.
And when I say super chapter, I really mean a lot of pictures and maybe not so much text. :D
Who is this strange creature, you ask? Why, this is Lillian Liddell, Gracey’s wife.
It seems that the Liddell’s have a thing for darkies. racism. lulz
They had a kid named Pinocchio… And he’s a ghost.
I finally got around to making a toddler skill line. 5 generations late, but better late than never, amirite?
Somebody help me. I think I just died from the cute.
John: “And then they lived happily ever after. That won’t happen to you though. You’ll probably marry some ugly-ass guy who doesn’t know his head from his ass and live in eternal misery.”
This is another nifty thing Poca brought back from Egypt. However, I don’t know how Kaa hitched a ride since he lived in the jungle. I guess some things are better left unknown.
Btw, can sims die from a snake bite? I sure hope so. >:D
Poca: “Do you have the grocery list?”
Poca: “Make sure we have everything.”
John: “Everything’s here, but…”
John: “I don’t think two babies were on the list.”
I need to kill myself.
Their names are Nala and Sarabi, and their traits are pain-in-the-ass, suicide-inducing, and fucktarded.
I grew Cinderella up right after that because there’s no way in hell I was going to deal with twin infants and a toddler.
And then I regretted it because she’s fucking gawjus.
Aurora: “Damn. I think I must have gotten some sort of bug. The last time I felt this bad was when I pricked my finger on a spinning wheel.”
Aurora: “Oh, I’m dying? That makes sense. lol”
Phillip: “You mean I escaped from the dungeon, fought my way through thorny vines, and killed a dragon for NOTHING?”
You didn’t actually do all of that stuff.
I didn’t get a picture of her gravestone. Whoops.
You’ll live. UNLIKE AURORA HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUR
Um. I don’t think I’m liking this.
Death: “You’re next.”
Cinderella, what are you doing?
Cindy: “Watching videos of babies and kittensssss :D”
‘Babies and kittens’ is code for porn.
*Note her shirt. :P
Since Brianna died (thank God), I needed someone new to paint the family portraits. LUCKILY, Cinderella just happens* to have the artistic trait, so she’ll master it quickly.
These two are so FUCKING CUTE. OMG
Sarabi is on the left and Nala is on the right.
Nala: “My mouth is bigger than yours!” *Stuffs block in mouth*
Sarabi: “u gonna get all da bitchez”
Oh, and I know that they are lionesses but their faces are tigers. Get at me.
Oh, and then Cinderella grew up…
And Phillip died with her watching.
Scarring children for life? Check.
Death: “I’ll be back for you.”
Death: “… But first I have some unfinished business.”
You take one of the twins and I’ll-
Death: “You were saying?”
i don’t even
And another one bites the dust.
RIP Generation 3! lol. that rhymed 8)
I swear this wasn’t my doing. It’s just that Bri grew to be so goddamn old that it seems unusual for the death of two generations to be so close.
Also I took like zero pictures while playing.
I didn’t realize it before, but Cinderella is pretty much a carbon copy of Pocahontas, except with blondish hair.
Cinderella: *cough gag* “I look like her? No way! She’s UGLY”
Poca: “Watch it, bitch, I gave you life.”
Cinderella: “Earth is my mother. You were just an instrument in her plan.”
Poca: “Fuck you, you pot-smoking, tree-hugging hippy.” *Eats meat-filled hot pocket*
Nala: “Cinderella just got owned by Mom, LOL”
Oh, they grew up? Again?
Nala: “And then he was like, ‘That’s not my wife! That’s a treadmill!'”
I’ve been hanging around this family for too long.
I think there’s something wrong with my brain.
Sarabi: “You mean like dis?” *crosses eyes*
Took the words right out of my mouth.
Sarabi: “When I grow up, I’m going to marry a king, and then we will build a HUGE kingdom!”
Sarabi: “See? It’ll look just like this, except, like, a million times bigger, duh.”
Sarabi: “And it’ll be filled with lots of cute wittle animals and we’ll all be happy and hold hands and kiss and love each other”
Sarabi: “But then an evil man named Scar will kill my husband and take over my kingdom, and it will get…”
Nala: “wtf is she talking about?”
Oh, you know kids and their imaginations. ._.
Nala: “Hey, Cinderella, you got something on your butt.”
Cindy: “What? Where?”
Nala: “MONKEYS ALWAYS LOOOOOOK”
John grew up. blergggggggggggh
I didn’t notice this before, but he has the same colored eyes as Pocahontas, which, in turn, is the same eye-color that every single heir/heiress has had since Reginald introduced it to the gene pool.
John: “RANDOM SCENE CHANGE TO CHINAAAAAAAA”
There’s really no way to introduce these vacations.
Except, maybe, more pictures. (which I don’t have d’ohhhhhhhhhhh)
Sarabi: “Nala pooped her pants, dur hur”
Fact: This family is the worst one to bring on vacations:
Pocahontas checked all the fucking sinks in the whole damn hotel as soon as they got there.
Poca: “I could have just saved all of our lives. For all we know, a snake could have come out of the drain and strangled us while we slept!”
I’m sorry to inform you, but I don’t think there are any mother fucking snakes in these mother fucking drains.
John went to buy some books (lolwut) and flirt with this Mulan-wannabe.
John: “So, bb, do you want to make a man out of me? ;)”
Cinderella raised her logic skill by herself because she is a loser and no one likes her.
And the twins did homework.
Nala: “What’s the difference between ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’?”
Sarabi: “About three inches.”
Remember when I said that John Rolfe was a pansy?
John: “Oh, no, you didn’t just diss my Louis Vuitton designer shoes, betch.”
Poca: “ET phone homeeeee”
I’m thinking it’s time for another MONTAGE:
Hmm you wish.
China is so preeeeetty.
So here’s a picture of a hill.
Nala: “I heard that Cinderella poops pumpkins and that’s why she has no friends.”
Sarabi: “Are you sure we’re related to her?”
Nala: “I hope not.”
Sarabi: “Shhh, she’s standing right there!”
Cindy: “Oh look at you two, exchanging secrets like best friends! What are you talking about? Are you talking about being friends? I have friends. Lots and lots of friends. yup yup.”
Nala: “Mice don’t count.”
This thing is my favorite thing ever.
I spent about an hour coming up with bad fortunes and making John eat them. >:D
John: “‘There is a picture of your butt all over the internet.’ THERE IS?”
No, but I can make it happen 8D
Poca: “You! Watch this! I will break this board with nothing but my hand.”
Or at least it would be if it weren’t made from Styrofoam. -_-
I’m creeping so hard right now, but I figured I’d give you a Drizella update. She and Sebastian had a black baby named Anita.
Sarabi and Nala: “What?”
Oh, nothing. It just feels as though your lives have passed right before my eyes.
Gossip gossip gossip
It’s all they ever do. Damn lionesses. Think they own the place.
They look exactly alike hngggggggggggggg
Except for their eye color. Sarabi has those damn Reginald eyes.
Sarabi: “I’m not Sarabi, I’m Nala.”
Nice try, dumbass, but I already figured you guys out.
And Nala has gray eyes, although I don’t know where from.
But other than that they look the same.
Even their stoner expression is the same.
Sarabi’s LTW is to have the Perfect Aquarium, or something. However, I don’t think she is going to catch much in the pool…
Sarabi: “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming, what do we do? We swim, swim.”
Nala: “Oh, look at my wrist. Such a lovely and dainty wrist that is perfect, just like the rest of me.”
Nala: “Tell me how perfect I am.”
CINDEREEEEELLA! You’re supposed to fix things, not break them!
Get to work! NOW
Poca: “ohai Alice”
Alice: “I was beginning to think you guys forgot about me.”
Now that Phillip is dead, there is no one to act like a tard at birthday parties.
And so, Cinderella grew up by herself. Alone. But that’s nothing new.
Here is Cinderella meeting her future husband, Prince Charming (yes, I changed his name to that.)
Cinderella: “He’s hott.”
Well, I figured I’d give you a break since you’re not going to be heir and no one likes you.
Cindy: “Let’s get married.”
Prince: “lol k”
Paper Boy: “You two start kissing in front of me and I’ll chop off all of your limbs and feed them to you.”
… Disney couples. What are you gonna do?
Paper Boy: “Start picking out my knives.”
Cindy: “I know we just met, but it feels as though we’ve known each other before. Will you marry me?”
Prince: “omg, this is all happening so fast.”
Well, you did only dance with her once.
Next: I’m a Dumbass
Ughhh this chapter was such a pain to write because I had nothing to write about.
Seriously, this is like the most boring generation ever, but the good news is that there are two more chapters until we are caught up with what is going on in-game. Hopefully Ambitions and Late Night will make these chapters more interesting instead of boring and repetitive and RUSHED BLAHHHHHHHH.
Don’t bother commenting on this chapter ’cause I know it sucked.